Monday Dare: Excellence in Wifery

Every Monday, I’m picking from the List of Things to Do, Places to Go, Possible Acts that Help and Possible Fun to Have. It’s a list I made before The Projectstarted and I’m still adding to it. If you have suggestions, please, feel free to throw them my way. I’m calling the list my Monday Dares, as I get overwhelmed just looking at the words “challenge” or “goal.”

This week: Let bygones be bygones.

Harv and I often spend Saturday afternoons running errands. Glamorous, I know.

One Saturday, we needed to hit several stores, so we carpooled to a large shopping center. He dropped me off at Target and then made his way to Best Buy.

Ninety minutes later, I got worried. Sure, it’s never a good idea to leave me unattended at Target (dammit, Harv, of course we need this avocado slicer), but the real test of our bank account is Harv inside a Best Buy.

I decided to give him a call. After a few attempts, he finally picked up the phone. He sounded a little preoccupied and asked if I could pick up dinner on the way home.

Me: I’m still at Target.

Harv: ……

Me: Hello?

Harv: I forgot that I dropped you off. I came back home to play my new video game.

It’s a good thing I woke up right then. It was a dream, but I was pissed. And, I’m still pissed.

So now, any time we go anywhere, I always part ways with a little warning.

Me: You’d better not leave me at *fill in the blank*, you jerk.

Harv: (sigh) I’m not really sure how to defend myself for something that happened in your dream, but come on, I bet it was World of Warcraft.

Me: Don’t try to weasel your way out of this. I’m still pissed and I’m not done punishing you.

I’m starting the new year fresh. Harv, I forgive you for leaving me at the store.
A big “Thank You for all of the Monday Dare suggestions y’all have sent. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll be able to fit “waitress at the local nudie bar” or “become penpals with a prisoner” into The Project.

A link to all of my previous Monday Dares is here, or you can just click the Monday Dare tab on the side bar.

Please leave some less fucked up other suggestions below. I have 4 slots left on my List of Monday Dares. If I use yours and it wasn’t previously on my list, I’ll give you credit and link to your site. I’ll also send you a $30 gift certificate of your choosing, as long as I can email or snail mail it to you fairly easily.  Don’t make me go to an obscure store in New Hampshire to buy it for you, folks.
photo via FranticMeerkat @

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